Got myself into a HUGE problem....just by being nice!

[bagpussinamerica]

Hi Guys, most of you know me. From Montana. Tarlovs Disease..still fighting with W/C, still getting treatments and validations from all over the place about the disease being injury related. This is not, however, why I am writing.

Whilst I was, unwillingly, sent to a pain clinic as an inpatient, I met several people there who I became very close to and friendly with. I am naturally a caring person so shared my story with others and gave what advice I could when I knew it was correct. Otherwise, just tried to keep up optimistic views regardless of how things were going. Unfortunately one person attached themselves to me. I didn't think this as a problem at the time. Until I returned home to find 46 phone messages on my phone over the space of 24 hours. This person suddenly found themselves thrown out of their home because of accusations that they became involved with someone on the unit. Later I found out that this actually did happen. I was also told by this person that they were is fear of their safety because of spousal abuse. This went on for days, even when I advised them to contact their attorney for advise and get the police involved with the abuse part. Long story short. Next thing I know I get an email from this person giving me time and date and flight arrival to Montana. To come and live with ME!!!!!! I explained to them that they needed to pay their own way financially since I hardly could make it on what I get from workers comp. They said no problems. Of course they arrive with nothing. So I have the problem of getting them in touch with people to help them with food stamps, benefit rights, legal rights, divorce rights etc. All this during a time when I can barely make it mentally on my own. Finally after four months of carrying this person financially to my own severe cost, I Femaled UP, and told them they had to go. They went the next day. Fine.

Until I was admitted into care to get my weight up for my next surgery. That was three days after they had left. They had gone to see an on line "lover", the third that I know of, and was sent back. My daughter took them back into my home when they called from a local place for people without homes. My daughter did not call me, she thought it was the Christian thing to do, and I honour her for that, but she has now landed me back with the same problem. And now not only do I have this person at my home, but my own daughter and her husband are there and I was just told he lost his job. I have no idea how I am going to pay the bills now. The mortgage is priority. My relationship with my daughter is fraught because of this. She honestly thought she was doing the right thing. What she does not know is that my neighbour has called me to tell me that this person has been saying that some of their items have gone missing and that they heard someone going through my room and found later items of my jewelerly on the floor. Now, not only are they not in my home with my approval, but I can't get them out, but they are now starting to cause controversy.

I have been told by them that they are getting workers comp to settle on their case for perm disability for fybromyalgia which they claim was caused by a fall at work. I have no idea about this. Not my area at all. But they say that they want to find work but cant work, but they won't apply properly for settlement or social security, both of which they they told me before they came was already sorted and being paid, I am still stuck and now I can not even be home to see the situation for myself. My friends and neighbours are getting truly pissed off by this person constantly calling them and ending up on their door steps in dramatic tears and hysterical fits. This is why I asked them to leave in the first place. How do I deal with this. I can't do anything from where I am. And my daughter, though now getting the same problems with this person, does not know how to handle it. I am not sure we can get rid of this person because no one is stepping up, not even their family, to pay for their assistance, or help them get back to where they came from.
They have tapped out all of their own friends and are now trying mine, HELP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[bronco54501]

bagpussinamerica .

You sure are in a pickle, I have always believed if I am able to help someone I would.. But also one must take care of them self and thier own family first.. But if they are helping them selfs to your neighbors belongings and taking advantage of the situation, you have to kick them to the curb no matter how bad you feel..

[jayne]

sweetheart you have no choice you must tell her to leave. If you have a trusted neighbor have the neighbor go over and tell her you have called the police to have her removed for stealing and they advice her to leave before the police get there and then back it up!I did the same thing about 5 years ago with a member on here it didnt go as far as yours did.God bless you ladybug

[bagpussinamerica]

tell me about it. I did "kick her to the curb" once already...and she bounced right back. Now I hear from my neighbour that she is getting money together to move and already has a ticket, but won't go anywhere until she has a job interview that she can make it to in N. Dakota. Now I am angry since I have carried her financially over the last couple of months and because of that I can't pay my power bill, which was just covered with a doctors note to say why it should not be cut off, and being put on a budget scheme. But they say if I can't pay that amount, they can still cut me off. So I am angry that this girl is getting money together for things she wants, but has not managed to get money together to live here in the first place. I have been so financially damamged by this I see no way out. I can't even get out of hospital to sort it out because it would be seen as 'Non Compliance" with workers comp!!!! I have asked that this girl call me, but so far nothing.

I won't be doing this again too soon.