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+--- Thread: perception of outsiders? (/showthread.php?tid=1249)
perception of outsiders? - tweety00 - 08-25-2007 06:16 AM
I had the chance to get outta the house last weekend ..
Had alot of people ask what happened to you ..
As i told them that I got hurt at work I noticed that ppl faces where like WOW you got it easy , not having to pay for your treatment untill
I explained THAT WOW what treatment ... ITS a good thing that I have my own insurance WHO by the way is paying for my treatment . I did meet alot of others who have had cervical surgery and even meet one Who also had 6 levels done ...
boy almost asked if it was you bad boy ... Been to rochester miinn lately lol or anyone else maybe lol
Most ppl think That if your on work comp that Wow you are so luck and its not costing you anything ..
I opened alot of eyes but then again I might have come off harsh too ..
What treatment !!!
Im still wondering if 1) since im MMI and Supposely CURED then how is my insurance going to cover any of the problems thats Im still having . ????
Venting hope everyone that you chat with is more curious as to how it really works !
RE: perception of outsiders? - Bad Boy Bad Boy - 08-25-2007 07:48 AM
MMI doesn't have to mean your cured.
MMI means the Doctor / 's think you as good as your going to be. But it doesn't mean Medical has to stop.
RE: perception of outsiders? - Lilly - 08-25-2007 08:25 AM
Hi,
I know the feeling tweety. My DEAR FRIEND has not spoken to me since she found out that I was still receiving weekly TTD payments...while not working! Guess she isn't as dear as I believed. Comments were made that it "must be nice" SHE had to work for a living.....and it ticked me off, as I have worked all my life & still would be had I not been injured....i told her I'd trade her places in a flash....I'll work with your good arm....and you can have mine, stay home and get paid... but the trade off is sleepless nights, great pain, sleeping on the sofa for 2 years, difficulties wiping yer butt, med refill problems, WC crap, inability to do simple things etc. etc. etc.!!!! She shut up.....but I haven't heard from her since....and I'm not sure I want to either.
It's sad how people perceive us (IW's). I don't ever recall thinking any of my fellow co workers who were hurt on the job as "lucky", and never will. I'd trade my screwed up body to anyone who thinks it's a free ride to being wealthy !! Which we all know that THAT isn't the case.
Hang in there tweety, and ignore the ignorant! Lilly
RE: perception of outsiders? - jayne - 08-25-2007 08:54 AM
yes and what I cant understand is then they think we get a million dollar settlement so we can live hi off the hog for the rest of our lives.........I tell all my friends and family get a disabilty policy insurance it just might save your home
RE: perception of outsiders? - Spring - 08-25-2007 09:46 AM
Tweety...This is post that I have often thought of talking about myself. So thank you for talking about it.
Yes...I have so many of my old employees ask me what I am doing...but Bad Boy & Still in Limbo helped me with that problem I have quit trying to even explain the medical problems...I am just going to say I am Retired and starting to figure out the next charpter in my life. Just for the same thing you are being responded with. But then again...as with you telling my friends and family that still know what is going on with my life....will make comments that can hurt the feelings very badly...specially when you need thier support so much. But I have come to the understanding that they just seem to forget how much is really going on with our lives....and if they really don't have to understand what is going on with our lives they don't have to offer support. They don't understand that when the pain or the fustration of wc is so bad for us....that to have a friend or family member their to understand would mean so much.....just to have them pick up the phone and say how are you today. Not to make the comments like what you got..:Like the old saying...you should really only be able to count your closest friends on one hand. I have come to find that saying so true.
As for the public I don't have to much approach me...but have had people in the Dr. Office ask me what is wrong....And I am very honest....but I tell them if you ever get hurt on the job...Do NOT go through WC....tell them anything to get it put on your private insurance. And then go on to tell them why I feel the way I do. Most people are stunned....and mostly men. But I always talk loud enough that I get everyones attention in the waiting room. Have even had people come up to me after my appointment...and ask to hear the rest of the story. I just think most people do think....that being on WC is like a vacation then you get paid big bucks. They don't hear what it is really all about. Refusal of treatments...being sent to quacks for IME...and if that quack IME doesn't say it the way the IC wants they will shop for one that will. Stop benifits. IW lossing everything they own. ETC. I have told many sure the minor injuries get taken care and get them back to work...it makes the wc stats look good. My case from the beginning went very well with the IC...I am sure they thought I would be back to work in no time....SO DID I. Then I had the problems....and oh how my care and the IC treatment towards me change. Will we ever get others to understand...most lilely not. So must surround ourselves with the people that do support and care for us. And we must pray if never happens to the others out there. I know it would be nice to make the people walk in your shoes that do not understand....but we must take the upper road. They may be here some day and need our support. I do though hope and pray that the wc system is forced to be held resposible for the actions that they force upon others. I know I have gotten off track. Thank you again for posting this topic. It does so much affect ever IW somewhere in their lifes. Please know we all here do know of all the struggles that every IW goes through...and we must be here to support each there.
RE: perception of outsiders? - Still in Limbo - 08-25-2007 10:52 AM
Tweety, I Posted before how my Best Friend since the 3rd Grade abandoned me when I got Hurt, and his Wife said "He doesn't come around because he hates to see you in so much Pain!" Well I made it very clear to both of them that I'm sorry I made them so uncomfortable, but if it was Him injured, I don't care if he lost both Legs, I would have been there for Him!! That Friendship is over, I don't need People so selfish that they can't put their own feelings aside to Help a Friend, that's not a Friend, I don't know what to call it! And as far as the Public, you will be hard pressed to have the majority understand. I've had People put their Heads down and look the other way to avoid conversation, and I've talked to others that have understood. It's tough when your injured, and you see Life going on as usual, and you feel like as you said, the outsider. We just have to struggle on, the ignorant will never understand, and others will give Pity, instead of Sympathy, and we don't want that either. So don't worry yourself as I used to, I now put my Energy in My Family, I keep them tight and close to me and I'm doing just fine now, and it's a lot easier when you can let that Outsider feeling go away, and I Hope You can soon. You Take Care my Friend, and remember, if they Judge you, you don't need them in your Life!! Take Care!
RE: perception of outsiders? - wowthathurt - 08-25-2007 03:35 PM
Am I glad this topic has come up. I've had some work people call up and be kind, but I've also had some be so nasty insinuating that there's nothing wrong with me. The part that is tough to ignore is that the nasty one is my direct lead and is a talker. Ugh. I just have to not think about him specifically because he is an emotional drain. When he pops into my mind I tell myself that he is NOT going to live rent-free in my head and I kick him out. Silly, but it works for me right now--those people are not worth the bother. You know that these injuries certainly affirm important things for you--like who is and who ain't your friends. Focus and be grateful for who is. Gratitude gets me through.
By the way, I so grateful for you!
RE: perception of outsiders? - Pooh - 08-25-2007 03:54 PM
Tweety
the funny thing is sometimes people don't see your injuries and then say your faking it - that happens so often with tissue, spinal, etc damages - which most of us have. So our "friends" think we are just milking the system and wanting time off. Boy are they so wrong. Most of those that know me - know that I am not that way. I get my groceries on good days at the store and carry them out myself - on bad days they carry them out for me - they understand. They couldn't believe the treatment I received. However, me talking about my injury - helped one of their workers who needed another surgery get additional time off for healing when he had his 2nd surgery. With my injuries similar to what his employees were - he decided to allow his employee to come back when he was fully healed instead of when the doctor put him back at light duty. It gave Jessie the extra time he needed for PT that he could do at home along with some strength training that the manager requested first so that this time he didn't over do it and re-injure his shoulder. So far he's doing good at work and says his shoulder is feeling a lot better.
So sometimes it's a matter of educating others and sometimes its a matter of helping others as well.
RE: perception of outsiders? - imsckofit - 08-25-2007 09:08 PM
I have got to say I had a friend who when we talked would try to say my pain was not as great as hers ? she would have aches and pains so I got to thinking she was judging me. She would say things like take some advile like that would make it better after all the commercials make it seem like advile is the BOMB RIGHT!
Needles to say I no longer talk to her since I'm in pain 24-7 I guess it makes people uncomfortable to know some people are really in bad shape...I should say she no longer calls so the point was made clear. What a shame how some humans are
I'm better off without that negative thoughts...
RE: perception of outsiders? - rholmes - 08-26-2007 06:00 AM
My thing is I have co-workers I have not heard from in 5,10,15 years call and say "I heard you got fired for faking injuries. Anyone that really knows me knows that I am a hard worker and I try to give 100% at anything I do. It hurts but I just keep on doing what I can to get back to work as soon as I can